~H~E~L~L~

Wednesday night something horrible happened...

My ex messaged me on RuneScape... Ok, so yeah that doesn't sound so bad...

But it is. Lol.

Anyways, For the past few days he's doing every attempt to get me back... I'm with someone else and he doesn't want it to be that way, well hate to tell him.. but I'm happy where I am at now. I love being loved by Timothy, I do. I love him as well. But Chris has been trying and trying to get me back, I don't understand why though. What did I do to him to spark his interest in me. He told me it was because I was real and I wasnt fake and I was the only one that made him happy. News flash buddy... You can be happy... You don't need me... No one does really... Now if people would see it like I do then none of this would have happened. Anyways, he's been telling me all kinda shit like he can't live without me and he wants me back and that he loves me. Shit. Lol. He told me that the reason we broke up this past time is cause his Grandpa has cancer and Chris was pushing everyone away. He kept texting me and texting me. Anyways we talked on the phone last night...

He was trying all his desperate attempts to get me back...

He even had the fuckin balls to tell me he was going to kill himself. Seriously... I was freaked out... I think I upset Dee and Timothy when I told them that I was talking to him, trying to talk him out of suicide. I honestly hate that after before we hung up he told me he was just saying that for every desperate attempt to get me back. It made me so pissed off at him, and I told him that too.

Also, before we hung up he asked me to do him a favor... I said what is it... the he asked again... I knew what he was going to say, so reluctantly, I said yeah.

He asked me "Do you love him?"

I was silent..

Then he said that he wanted to hear it.

I said "I do." He started to cry and he said "What?"

Then I said "I do love him."

He started crying harder and then we hung up.

I got Timothy and Dee to three way me on the phone and we talked for a little bit then Dee decided to give Timothy his number..

I was so nervous, I didn't know what to do.

Timothy was nice to him, although he didn't have to be. I'm proud of my Love.

After three calls to Chris, I went to lay down and talk to Timothy, he talked me to sleep, as always... <3.

I woke up this morning and had four texts from Chris... They said..

"I love you. Sorry abt last night. I didn't mean it, if you really love him stay with him, im happy for you. Best of luck babygirl."

Then another one that said...

"I can't be your friend when you love somebody else, but I want you to know I'm going to wait for you, I know one day you'll realize I'm the right one for you to be with forever, have your fun with him.. I'm not going to date, only wait for my babygirl to come back.. I love you Amber. I really hope you realize before you graduate, I want you up here with me.. Let me put you thro school, and let me take care of you during it."

Well... I don't know what to think about it, I'm trying so hard not to think about it. I don't want him... I'm content and fine the way I am. Why me, I ask... Well, I guess it's cause I'm myself and that's what people like about me. I'm not sure. I'm not as great as everyone makes me out to be?

Not sure...

But whatever...

I'm off for now.

<3

xXx Ai Shiteru xXx Sabishii xXx

LovePeaceHug

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